Church Research

Juanita · Guru

RE: Church Research

Juanita · Guru

Kelly,

Juanita · Guru

Oops, hit enter too soon. Dang phone. Kelly, please don't take this wrong, but what you describe breaks my heart. The last thing people should feel is "empty and hollow" and I hate that that is what feels "normal" to you. I don't mean to offend you in ANY way, it just saddens me :(

kris · Guru

april . . .I wish you were closer so I could squeeze you

that's all.

I'm just proud of you . . . for opening your heart.

I'm pressed for time today so I'm trying to read fast . . I don't know if I read it here or the IC thread but about the way you were feeling and not telling Matt - my thought is (b/c I had a spouse who didn't go with me for a long time) - he's thrilled you're going. He is going to be there to hold your hand the entire journey. He will answer your questions if you want him to and with a happy and joyful heart, I'm sure!

xo

daisy · Guru

Juanita wrote:
Oops, hit enter too soon. Dang phone. Kelly, please don't take this wrong, but what you describe breaks my heart. The last thing people should feel is "empty and hollow" and I hate that that is what feels "normal" to you. I don't mean to offend you in ANY way, it just saddens me :(

it's totally ok, not offended. it's a weird thing to explain. despite the hollow, it feels like it is what it's supposed to be. it doesnt make me love God any less, or anything like that - and a relationship with God is still definitely attainable and maintainable. but the church-going experience is seriously totally different. something keeps us there though - it's mobbed every week!

kris · Guru

the casual dress really makes me happy.

When I first started I would dress in suits, etc. My "sunday" best.

now it is jeans (and sometimes a Colt's jersey - well, not THIS year!).

I've always felt that God does not care what I'm wearing . . . he cares that I'm there so I've gone with that.

plus I'm totally a blue jeans kinda girl!

Juanita · Guru

And not to pick on Catholics at all, but honestly, if i had to do all of those prayers, word for word, I'd never, ever go to church, lol. That's too much man-made crap that I despise in churches. Too impersonal for me. I want fellowship, I want people to know my name and my family and care about me. That's what I really love about Sunday school. You get to know a small group of people personally, people you hang out with outside the church doors. In fact, my old church called them "small groups" instead if Sunday school. I love that.

Juanita · Guru

ME TOO KRIS!! I love that I can wear what I want! Our preacher often wears just slacks and a shirt, sometimes jeans.

Juanita · Guru

And just for the record, I'd squeeze you too April, after I wiped the tears from my eyes. Sooooo proud and happy for you.

Juanita · Guru

Kelly, it's your relationship with God that matters anyway, so if you have that, you have enough :). And again, I didn't mean to offend you at all. If that's what feels right to you, that's all that matters.

daisy · Guru

Juanita wrote:
And not to pick on Catholics at all, but honestly, if i had to do all of those prayers, word for word, I'd never, ever go to church, lol. That's too much man-made crap that I despise in churches. Too impersonal for me. I want fellowship, I want people to know my name and my family and care about me. That's what I really love about Sunday school. You get to know a small group of people personally, people you hang out with outside the church doors. In fact, my old church called them "small groups" instead if Sunday school. I love that.

i dont think you'd survive a second at my church - haha. it's exactly what you wouldnt like. there are probably 100 (at least) people at a mass, and i literally cannot tell you the name of one person besides R. i don't even know the preists' names most of the time. SOMETIMES i'll see my neighbor, but the church is huge and it's not like we sit together. and during "peace be with you" it seems people have taken to just nodding (flu season?)

very impersonal on that level. but kinda meditative too, bc it's not about the other people - it really is just about you and the service. R came home with the hail mary and our father to memorize the other day btw...i've been bad about going over it with her :bag

apies · Guru

thanks girls. LOL

matt sent me this in an email this morning:

I know it's overwhelming. It is a little for me too as I'm relearning stuff, gaining new perspective and seeing my wife struggling with all of this as well.

I'll be there for you and I love you.

he's got my back. :)

Juanita · Guru

I love Matt. That's so awesome! See? We told you he'd support you ;)

Juanita · Guru

Haha, I probably would DIE Kelly, lol

daisy · Guru

Juanita wrote:
Kelly, it's your relationship with God that matters anyway, so if you have that, you have enough :). And again, I didn't mean to offend you at all. If that's what feels right to you, that's all that matters.

it feels right in an academic sense, which is sort of enough for me i think. i've done a ton of soul searching and i'm back to catholicism, for whatever reason, so i've stopped questioning it kwim? it's hard to get R enthused about it though, that's for sure! plus DH is not cath -- so. we'll get there.

daisy · Guru

Juanita wrote:
Haha, I probably would DIE Kelly, lol

lol, i know, right??? (and not offended at ALL!!! promise).

CoffeeQueen · Guru

OoPs, Kelly. That was suppose to be I am raising them in he episcopal church. They do their program sunday after mass. No weekday classes.

Baptist churches are few and far between here. We have a mix of everything though. We have a huge Muslim population also in Michigan. Catholic use to be #1, but not so muh anymore. It depends on the area of the state. Our school is Christian based, but founded by Catholics, so we do offer catholic formation after school for catholic children. All students do have Christian life class during school day though. It is not the same as catholic formation classes, just more values, morals, bible teaching.

Juanita · Guru

daisy wrote:
Juanita wrote:
Kelly, it's your relationship with God that matters anyway, so if you have that, you have enough :). And again, I didn't mean to offend you at all. If that's what feels right to you, that's all that matters.
it feels right in an academic sense, which is sort of enough for me i think. i've done a ton of soul searching and i'm back to catholicism, for whatever reason, so i've stopped questioning it kwim? it's hard to get R enthused about it though, that's for sure! plus DH is not cath -- so. we'll get there.

i understand that perfectly smile

Juanita · Guru

daisy wrote:
Juanita wrote:
Haha, I probably would DIE Kelly, lol
lol, i know, right??? (and not offended at ALL!!! promise).

good smile

supergrover · Guru

Corey wrote:
it is funny how many of us raised as Catholics have been turned off by the exact same elements.
i totally get what kelly means about that empty and hollow feeling.
as a kid church was all about being fake smiley, surface chit chat, everyone glaring if a kid made so much as a peep. it always just seems so fake to me. everyone trying to look like the perfect church going family.
when i met dave we started going to his church (congregationalist). i'm guessing that is not common in other parts of the country as it is the church the pilgrims founded when they got here and we live in pilgrim country.:)
totally different experience. everyone is very warm and inviting. the $ pressure is non existent. they pass a plate at service and you either give or you don't. noone pays attention at all. there is a more rocking type of service, nobody cares if someone is walking their fussy baby up and down the aisle, etc.
i don't necessarily think it is a northern vs southern thing. i think it just happens that we happen to have a huge amount of Catholic churches in this area.
edited to say oops wrong thread;)

-- Edited by Corey on Wednesday 25th of January 2012 04:27:48 PM

The last Catholic Church we were members of- we had preprinted envelopes and would receive statements about how much we'd paid in on any cgiven cycle. We'd also- mid mass- have to fill out a card once a year with how much we would give and that would be on the statement.

very $$$ driven. Big turn off.