Mother's Day

Cuppycake · Guru

Mother's Day

Robin · Guru

Usually I give pictures of the kids to my mom and mil for Mother's Day.

Sometimes I'll give my mom some gardening gloves or something.

Glen gets his mother a card.

That's it.

Supafly · Guru

Leah, that is complete BS, and I would so totally pull the mom card on that one. Or have Joe do it.

We do go by his parent's house as well as mine during the day (since they both live within 10 minutes of us), but at least the morning is all about me at home.

I don't really mind seeing them. We rarely ever do any big things, though sometimes his dad will have dinner. It is the one night of the year that the boys actually all chip in a do the dishes and stuff, lol. But it is all low key, you know?

Once in a blue moon, I will plan something for my mom and I to do, but usually we do it on a different day and Mother's day is reserved for me. She understands-I have young kids and I need the pampering, lol!

This year I told Bill I want to go out for brunch after church. Of course, everyone else will be doing that too, but it will still be fun.

You should not have to cook on Mother's day. I would flat out refuse, honestly. IDK what time the celebration is there, but I would tell them you are available at such and such a time, but that a certain block of your day is reserved for you to spend with your family being pampered as well. Something like that. You don't need an excuse-you are a MOTHER. It is YOUR day as much as any other mom on the planet!!!!!

Cuppycake · Guru

Supa, that's kind of how I feel about it put into words that don't start the f bomb, lmao. I understand why everyone else wants to since they don't have kids, but I just don't want to do it. It's at 2, but 45 minutes away, so by the time I cook something (or if Joe cooked something, I'd still have to clean it up either that day or the next day), getting over there and hanging out pretty much takes up the entire day, and since it's not *my* mom, I'm just not feeling it. Sounds totally horrible, said like I just said it, but I'm going to say something to Joe about it if he doesn't on his own. (I'm kind of hoping he's psychic and realizes that my toes feel stepped on without me bitching about it, but that may not be reasonable, lmao.)

Supafly · Guru

lmao-drop the f bomb all you like. Seriously, that is just messed up.

I think it would be awesome if Joe could read your mind!!! However...just to be on the safe side, I would tell him, lol. I bet Hannah would tell him too! It would really suck to end up fighting with him about it too. Did she text only you, or Joe also? Did you tell him about it already?

Yeah, I don't mind hanging out with my ILs, but they don't start ANYTHING at 2pm. That is craziness for them-they live on a farm for God's sake!! Mother's day for my MIL means she gets the easy farm jobs that day, lmao. So that helps us too-dinner with them is never before 5:30. But in your case??? No way. I wouldn't do it. And I wouldn't even feel bad about saying no.

And if worst case, you DO get suckered into coming, I would totally buy something pre-made and put it in your own dish.

Cuppycake · Guru

lmao, Supa, you make my heart feel super (or supa, I guess) happy. <3

She texted both of us, it turns out late last night. So I didn't get it until this morning, and Joe was asleep. When he got up, I asked him if he'd gotten the text, and he had, and I was like, "Annnnndddd...." lmao. Yeah, total let down on his lack of espn (sorry, it was calling for a Mean Girls movie reference.)

Anyways, I told him my position in a nicer way than I legit feel, and he totally agreed that it would take up the entire day and that I deserved to be his focus that day, so he's going to text her later and tell her that we have plans. "Do we?" I asked. "No." He replied. So now I just have to hope he plans something lovely for me, lmao. That is relaxing. And will not require me to clean up or anything. (And he's currently doing the dishes for me, 5 feet away, so he gets a pass today.) <3

kdrew · Guru

Eff that. Take the day off. Tell them that that is Joe's present to you and that you cannot attend.

kdrew · Guru

Oh and to answer your question. I call my mom and tell her happy mothers day. If she lived her id probably take her out to lunch but still have me time the rest of the day.

supergrover · Guru

I knew I'd be resentful because Travis's head is so in his PhD program right now that I knew he would forget. Today at breakfast I told him, "I don't care about or want anything for my birthday. Really. But Mothers day means a lot to me". He looked at me blankly, so I said "Mothers Day. Next Sunday". I got a big "oooohhhhhh".

He better not forget.

I get my mom flowers and a card. Travis's mom gets a call. Step moms don't get anything, honestly.

3s_a_crowd · Guru

I get my mom a card and gift card and will call her.

My parents anniversary is the day before mothers day this year.

Dh gets his mom a card and usually a gift card and will call her as well.

Dh got me an ipad2 so hes using that as my gift for all occasions for the rest of the year. But I did catch him looking at pajamagrams for me. I told him not too because of how much he spent on the ipad, but its the thought that counts and it was sweet. However he is leaving for a week on mothers day .

Im glad Joe decided to tell her you cant go and hope he plans something super awesome for you

LucsMama · Senior Member

UGH!!! I totally get where you are coming from... today my Mom asked about our plans and kind of joked that everyone (my parents, my sister and her husband and 2 kids, and my brother and his 3 kids) could come over for lunch after church since we never get to host anything. We live 25 minutes from everyone. She was half joking and half serious and I told her that I think Mother's day should be kid free because I spend every day that isn't Mother's Day with my kid (and I watch my nephews during the week also) I think I really hurt her feelings. She wanted to have a big family get together even though we just had one last Sunday on Easter. I LOVE my family and I love when we are all together but I think I should get to decide what I want to do for my Mother's day now that I am a Mom.

I want to try and take my Mom to lunch just me and her this week.

I'm not sure what to do for my Mother-in-law or stepmom-in-law. I guess I have a week to figure that out!!!

CoffeeQueen · Guru

Every year I battle with this day. How do you please all of us. My mom, rich's mo
and I. Someone is going to feel shafted. I was doing. Brunch that all of us went to. This then allowed the rest of my day for me. This year I do not know what to do.

First, I know I will not be cooking. That is for darn sure. Why they do not celebrate you also is crazy and would piss me off.

Glad Joe told them you have plans. That was a gift in itself lol.

CoffeeQueen · Guru

Swear to goodness that I can type and spell. Posting on my itouch just does not work for me. Sorry for my crazy sentences and words. :)

JenM · Senior Member

I'm not surprised she said that. Can you see me eye rolling in Az? I'm glad Joe is telling her to piss off in a way.

My Mom gets a call, my Aunt who is like a mom a card. I wish I thought of something clever for her. Lol.

As for me, I am actually working. Boo, yes. But Boston trip is my mothers day/birthday present so I'm ok with it :)

Corey · Guru

that is my biggest pet peeve...the mothers who no longer have children living at home feeling like they are the ones that should be pampered/cooked for.

eff no. my own mother told my sister and i that instead of a gift for mother's day she wants us to come over once per week (like forever) and clean her house. are you flipping kidding me lady? i can barely keep my own house clean, plus i clean an office at night. i am so not spending every 7th day cleaning someone else's house.

okay, off my me tangent;) no no no...do not give in and go. if you are anything like me you will resent it forever and constantly fight the urge to bring it up in future arguments. :)

can you tell i am getting super heated over here? lmao.

sappy · Guru

mothers day is a total downer here.

my family pretty much never does anything for me. last year i got to stay home with the kids in the morning while dan went to the grocery store and get me flowers and a donut or something.

every year i whine and bitch about it and every year it's the same.

as for my mom ... i'm sure we'll go over there at some point?

dan's mom lives out of town so i'm thinking of ordering her some flowers but i don't know if she'll be home or out visitng HER mom out of town....

Corey · Guru

sappy wrote:
mothers day is a total downer here.
my family pretty much never does anything for me. last year i got to stay home with the kids in the morning while dan went to the grocery store and get me flowers and a donut or something.
every year i whine and bitch about it and every year it's the same.
as for my mom ... i'm sure we'll go over there at some point?
dan's mom lives out of town so i'm thinking of ordering her some flowers but i don't know if she'll be home or out visitng HER mom out of town....

i think you need to announce now that you will be leaving for the day and having time to yourself. then you can avoid the waiting around and will he do something or not anxirty. :)

Alyssa · Guru

When we lived in NY, we would do something with my mom and usually EJ's mom. Not really anytime for me. And my mom is all about the guilt trip so I'm really happy I do not live close by anymore.

This year I'm sending my mom a small gift and having Ethan make her a picture. I'll call her.

It's actually Ethan's weekend with EJ, which I'm fine with. I am going to take Ethan to breakfast in the am, then I can go about the rest of my day. I think we are going to ikea. lol.

Jenn, I'm totally with you. I feel like Mother's Day is more important than my birthday.

Leah, I'm glad Joe is on your side of things. You deserve a special day.

Erin · Guru

Corey wrote:
sappy wrote:
mothers day is a total downer here.
my family pretty much never does anything for me. last year i got to stay home with the kids in the morning while dan went to the grocery store and get me flowers and a donut or something.
every year i whine and bitch about it and every year it's the same.
as for my mom ... i'm sure we'll go over there at some point?
dan's mom lives out of town so i'm thinking of ordering her some flowers but i don't know if she'll be home or out visitng HER mom out of town....
i think you need to announce now that you will be leaving for the day and having time to yourself. then you can avoid the waiting around and will he do something or not anxirty. :)

dit.to Make a plan now!! And then, enjoy it without guilt.

Every year I think about Kristi's mother's day plan (shopping, day to herself). Love it. That is what I would be doing, but, since Boston is later that week, and that is 4 days of "me time" so I won't push my luck.

Erin · Guru

Cuppycake wrote:
Supa, that's kind of how I feel about it put into words that don't start the f bomb, lmao. I understand why everyone else wants to since they don't have kids, but I just don't want to do it. It's at 2, but 45 minutes away, so by the time I cook something (or if Joe cooked something, I'd still have to clean it up either that day or the next day), getting over there and hanging out pretty much takes up the entire day, and since it's not *my* mom, I'm just not feeling it. Sounds totally horrible, said like I just said it, but I'm going to say something to Joe about it if he doesn't on his own. (I'm kind of hoping he's psychic and realizes that my toes feel stepped on without me bitching about it, but that may not be reasonable, lmao.)

this always drives me crazy too. Not my mom, yet I feel like the expectation is for me to make sure something happens or is celebrated for his mom. Um, I have stopped worrying about it or feeling guilty (for birthdays, etc). Makes me feel a bit selfish, but I have enough to worry about.