and I totally feel like a bad mom lately. I get so irritated with Dominic and all I do is yell! I hate it! I want to stop but I don't know how. Mostly it is at bedtime when I have been with him all day and am exhausted. I have a routine of starting to read books to him every night at 8:30 and then I brush his teeth and he watches tv in his room for a little while. Tonight I had to go grocery shopping after I put him to bed and as soon as I got home he was out of bed saying he needed to brush his teeth again because Daddy gave him a juice box. This pisses me off because I swear my husband just goes against anything I do or say. I can't stand it! And I have talked to him about it and he said I was a Nazi and running a Nazi camp. Please! I'm sorry I don't let my kid stay up all night and eat junk food until midnight! Aaaagggh! He doesn't understand that after being with Dominic all day I need a break! And he doesn't care. Anyway I am trying to bring the groceries in while my husband is sitting on the couch playing x-box and Dominic is in the kitchen screwing around when he is supposed to be in bed so I am of course yelling at him to get back in bed. It just always makes me feel bad. I just don't have the option to get away like my husband does, he goes to work everyday, that is it. I have to do everything for Dominic 100%, do all our budgets and bills, grocery shop, clean and look for a job on top of that. I don't have any friends that I can go out with or vent to, it just sucks. :( I guess I just need to hear that I am not the only Mom who yells at her kid, I hope?
-- Edited by Domimom on Wednesday 25th of August 2010 12:57:14 AM
You need to get your DH on the same page with you first. It would make things much easier if you guys parented the same way, and less confusing for Dominic. That sucks that you are dealing with that. But you are not the only one who yells. I do plenty of that. LOL Hang in there.
Thank you. I have tried to talk to my husband and it just doesn't help, I just have to accept that he will never be on the same page as me, I don't think he wants to be the bad guy, whatever. I refuse to have a kid that is out of control so I have to be the mean one and accept that he will won't help me. It sucks but that is how it is.
Jasmine, you are not alone-I think there are very few parents who never ever yell. And when you have a spouse who isn't helping or who is undoing the things you are doing, it makes it even harder.
I have found when I have one of them (particularly Anna-Kate is more independent) it can actually be harder on me than with both of them. Unlike when they were babies, now they really entertain each other so I am not "needed" 100% of the time. So I think it really can be particularly draining for a mom of a preschooler when there is one child who wants you to play with him, entertain him, etc.
I have no advice about the husband thing-I guess if you could figure out what motivates him, you could work on him that way, but some men seem to really just struggle with this. Mine isn't quite as bad, but has some of these issues too-it can drive me crazy at times.
I really don't have anything helpful to add but I only yell at my kids when they fight with each other.
(which is all the dadgum time.)
And I had to tell my dh the other day at bedtime when he told Mark that he COULD watch a movie after I told him that he couldn't that it was just too hard always having 3 against one, and that I was giving up.