momsquawk has me convinced i am about to croke...

daisy · Guru

RE: momsquawk has me convinced i am about to croke...

Juni · Guru

daisy wrote:

Juni wrote:

Well, as someone who did see the pic/comment on FB it didn't even make me think of Kelly and as I read back through this thread it was Kelly herself who stepped up to apologize if she made people feel bad even though nowhere was she pointed out specifically. So, that is mostly where I am coming from in terms of this post. It was very lighthearted (IMO) and did not point out any one person but then Kelly seemed to get all defensive.

So, yeah I can see as it's progressed but it seemed to me that she was the one that kind of got the ball rolling, kwim? I thought this post was (initially) very light hearted and joking and I didn't see anything wrong with it.

well in all fairness, i like to think of my tone as more apologetic than defensive - lol.
i got a bit defensive when i felt i was beign talked about. other than that, i just wanted to let you guys know that i didnt mean to hurt feelings, and that i was ok with a jab here and there. not sure what the problem is with that, really. as SOON as the leah thing was cleared up, i said i fully believed her, and i do, and i trust corey, and i have no bad feelings about that.

and while i dont know what's going on in the MSBL threads, here on the BP, i have been the one who's the health nut lately, so i think it was a fair assumption.

I appreciate you saying that. :) I did find it defensive but can totally see how the two can be confused, especially in this medium.

I think you threw me for a loop when you came back after saying things were cool because you were upset people might have been talking behind your back. Honestly, I just felt bad because I knew Corey and Leah were not making fun of you and were totally joking and it bugged me that they felt like they had to come here to apologize when there was nothing to apologize for. And I'm totally not pinning that on you, just saying. :)

Michele · Senior Member

Taking a piece of Michelle's reply above:

"Regarding the red... I do understand what you're saying here, and I actually think that's Melissa's point. From her POV, she was just really excited about the changes she was making. Was there a tone of righteousness? I won't say there never was, but has anyone else heard that adage about "there are none so righteous..." (surely you have ;) ). But the bottom line was that these posts were driven not by spite but by her enthusiasm -- enthusiasm that was causing other people to feel bad. So she's forced with a choice -- please others, or feel good herself.

It's not just here on this board that this happens -- this is the state of our world today, particularly for women. The message is "shine, but don't shine so much that you make others feel insecure."

And as a mother of two girls, I'm having a really hard time trying to figure out what the hell I'm going to teach them. "

Well said Michelle. I like how you worded this.

mctex · Guru

Corey wrote:

Okay, first thing- my original post was a joke, plain and simple. I was not being passive aggressive. If I really felt horrible about my habits b/c of Kelly's threads (and I am only naming her specifically b/c she was referenced in your post regarding my intentions, Michelle)-well, I have her I'm, email, and home address-if I was honestly upset I couldve sent her a letter).

The croke vs croak response was defensive. When I saw your post, Michelle, to April that said something like "really? You feel like you are going to "croke" followed by lllllooooll!, well, I took that as you laughing at my stupid mistake.

In retrospect I can see that you were probably lllloooll'ing at the irony that it was April of all people that responded she felt similarly. I apologize if I took what was probably teasing directed at her as slyly making fun of me.

I was LOLing at the mental image of April sitting at her keyboard, extremely conflicted.

She wants to reference the title, but if she does, it will literally make her croak to make the the same typo -- b/c she's April.

And if she doesn't make the same typo, she runs the risk of making you feel like a jackass because she's inherently pointing out the typo.

So she just says "I feel the same" instead, thus avoiding the dilemma altogether.

(IDK if this sort of thing happens for April, but it does for me all the time. Which is why it takes me like 15 minutes for every fucking post -- seriously, y'all would die if you could see me actually typing.)

But at any rate, I apologize to you as well -- given that April herself didn't initially realize where I was going with that, ITTTTTU why you wouldn't have. You're not the only one who apparently can't joke effectively over the internet, LOL!

(And in the name of total honesty, I wanted to go on record as foreshadowing that the thread was going to be somehow noteworthy. Because even in my wannabe kinder and gentler form, I still LOVE to be right. biggrin )

(This whole thread has made me realize how badly it sucks that we don't have some of the old emoticons. I really wanted to shoot myself in the head after that last statement, LOL!)

apies · Guru

ok, first i want to say that because kelly's feelings were hurt, i'm SO sorry that i ever commented in this thread to begin with. kelly, i have SO much respect for you - how you care for your family and raise your girls and i would never want to hurt your feelings. if anything that i said here hurt your feelings, i'm sorry.

ita with supa's post about how the board waxes and wanes. certain topics become popular and we go crazy talking about them. then they die down and new ones come along. i'm thinking about how hard i laughed when i saw kristi's "kelly" M2M thread yesterday - about getting on the bandwagon. i know that i wasn't laughing AT kelly because of that thread. just at kristi's joking about how kelly and melissa have been at the center of many of the threads lately. i KNOW how kelly's personality is - she is a researcher, so when something is on her brain, she will study it to death until she feels comfortable she has the full picture and can make the right choice and move forward. (i think, for example, about the backyardigans panic back around the time we traveled to NYC. i remember at our big group dinner, we talked about how she had taken away all tv for the week and how she was going crazy.

)

i guess what i really don't get is that after 5+ years together for some of us, we STILL don't know/trust each other enough to give them credit. i know i do that sometimes and i think that about several different people involved in this thread. i truly don't think kelly would EVER take the tone of being better than the rest of us who are not making the same choices. her heart is such that she feels the NEED to share the vital information that she learned with other moms that she cares about. end of story. eta: i think tx is right that it's a result of the sterile environment of a message board where we can't validate our friendship other than through words.

not that this thread needed more opinions, but there's mine.

oh, and to tx - first, i know you're LOVING psychoanalyzing all that has gone down here. i know how much you LOVE that.

and you hit the nail on the head about the typo. it's SUCH a catch-22 for me! i never judge people by typos (except for there/their/they're - get that shit right, people - LMFAO & j/k) - but you're right that if i comment or quote a typo, i feel like people are going to call ME out for not calling the OP out. and if i DO comment to the OP about it, they are going to feel bad, so of course i don't want to do that either! ahh, the internal conflicts of an english teacher. (please note the lack of all capitalization in my posts :)

-- Edited by apies on Wednesday 10th of February 2010 03:36:31 PM

Sonya · Guru

apies wrote:

ok, first i want to say that because kelly's feelings were hurt, i'm SO sorry that i ever commented in this thread to begin with. kelly, i have SO much respect for you - how you care for your family and raise your girls and i would never want to hurt your feelings. if anything that i said here hurt your feelings, i'm sorry.

ita with supa's post about how the board waxes and wanes. certain topics become popular and we go crazy talking about them. then they die down and new ones come along. i'm thinking about how hard i laughed when i saw kristi's "kelly" M2M thread yesterday - about getting on the bandwagon. i know that i wasn't laughing AT kelly because of that thread. just at kristi's joking about how kelly and melissa have been at the center of many of the threads lately. i KNOW how kelly's personality is - she is a researcher, so when something is on her brain, she will study it to death until she feels comfortable she has the full picture and can make the right choice and move forward. (i think, for example, about the backyardigans panic back around the time we traveled to NYC. i remember at our big group dinner, we talked about how she had taken away all tv for the week and how she was going crazy. )

i guess what i really don't get is that after 5+ years together for some of us, we STILL don't know/trust each other enough to give them credit. i know i do that sometimes and i think that about several different people involved in this thread. i truly don't think kelly would EVER take the tone of being better than the rest of us who are not making the same choices. her heart is such that she feels the NEED to share the vital information that she learned with other moms that she cares about. end of story. eta: i think tx is right that it's a result of the sterile environment of a message board where we can't validate our friendship other than through words.

not that this thread needed more opinions, but there's mine.

oh, and to tx - first, i know you're LOVING psychoanalyzing all that has gone down here. i know how much you LOVE that. and you hit the nail on the head about the typo. it's SUCH a catch-22 for me! i never judge people by typos (except for there/their/they're - get that shit right, people - LMFAO & j/k) - but you're right that if i comment or quote a typo, i feel like people are going to call ME out for not calling the OP out. and if i DO comment to the OP about it, they are going to feel bad, so of course i don't want to do that either! ahh, the internal conflicts of an english teacher. (please note the lack of all capitalization in my posts :)

-- Edited by apies on Wednesday 10th of February 2010 03:36:31 PM

Nicely said and I completely feel the same way.

Please, don't let this be the issue that divides us. We have lost so many members and we can't afford to lose any more.

daisy · Guru

Sonya wrote:

apies wrote:

ok, first i want to say that because kelly's feelings were hurt, i'm SO sorry that i ever commented in this thread to begin with. kelly, i have SO much respect for you - how you care for your family and raise your girls and i would never want to hurt your feelings. if anything that i said here hurt your feelings, i'm sorry.

ita with supa's post about how the board waxes and wanes. certain topics become popular and we go crazy talking about them. then they die down and new ones come along. i'm thinking about how hard i laughed when i saw kristi's "kelly" M2M thread yesterday - about getting on the bandwagon. i know that i wasn't laughing AT kelly because of that thread. just at kristi's joking about how kelly and melissa have been at the center of many of the threads lately. i KNOW how kelly's personality is - she is a researcher, so when something is on her brain, she will study it to death until she feels comfortable she has the full picture and can make the right choice and move forward. (i think, for example, about the backyardigans panic back around the time we traveled to NYC. i remember at our big group dinner, we talked about how she had taken away all tv for the week and how she was going crazy. )

i guess what i really don't get is that after 5+ years together for some of us, we STILL don't know/trust each other enough to give them credit. i know i do that sometimes and i think that about several different people involved in this thread. i truly don't think kelly would EVER take the tone of being better than the rest of us who are not making the same choices. her heart is such that she feels the NEED to share the vital information that she learned with other moms that she cares about. end of story. eta: i think tx is right that it's a result of the sterile environment of a message board where we can't validate our friendship other than through words.

not that this thread needed more opinions, but there's mine.

oh, and to tx - first, i know you're LOVING psychoanalyzing all that has gone down here. i know how much you LOVE that. and you hit the nail on the head about the typo. it's SUCH a catch-22 for me! i never judge people by typos (except for there/their/they're - get that shit right, people - LMFAO & j/k) - but you're right that if i comment or quote a typo, i feel like people are going to call ME out for not calling the OP out. and if i DO comment to the OP about it, they are going to feel bad, so of course i don't want to do that either! ahh, the internal conflicts of an english teacher. (please note the lack of all capitalization in my posts :)

-- Edited by apies on Wednesday 10th of February 2010 03:36:31 PM

Nicely said and I completely feel the same way.

Please, don't let this be the issue that divides us. We have lost so many members and we can't afford to lose any more.

tysm for this post. april you totally have my number on the research-into-ground -- i go through waves - panic, info overload, more panic, parse it down, mental outline, discuss with others, the peace.
i dont plan to leave the board over this. i'm not mad at any of you.

xoxo.