a girl i worked with for a couple years called me yesterday to say she got engaged on thanksgiving. we haven't worked together in a year and a half and maybe talk on the phone once a month, but have never gone out together or anything like that.
this morning i received a text message asking me to be in her wedding. ay yay yay...i have no desire, but have absolutely no idea how to respond. for her friend's wedding that she was maid of honor in, they went to vegas for the bachelorette and i assume she will want something similarly over the top. the thought of spending a ton of money on a dress, gift, shower, bachelorette, etc for someone who is not a very close friend makes me queasy...what would you say??
I would ask when the wedding is and say oh Ill be busy around then or Id rather not have my baby bump be a distraction in a dress or the kids will just be getting out of or into school or Ill have a newborn baby. But if you need help with invitations or something I could help out or something to that affect,
Tracy's onto something golden. That's probably what I'd do... And, I wouldn't feel bad (which is weird for me because I always feel bad when I say no, lol) about it. She asked you via text, which I gotta say, is pretty impersonal.
I think Tracy and Leah make great points. Especially the whole being asked via text... I don't know it almost sounds like it's not that important to her. I would totally play the prego/newborn card, honestly i'm uncomfortable for you, were you guys great friends while you worked together? When I think of being in someones wedding I think of super close friends that I can pretty much count on one hand and very close family. Ugh, tough situation though. I want to say theres no way I would do it but thats easy for me to say since i'm not in the situation.
no, we weren't "great" friends at all. basically, i was the receptionist at a hair salon and the day i worked it was just her and the owner who were the hairdressers. obviously, we chatted because we were the only ones close in age, but i don't think we ever went out together outside of work stuff. i went to a party at her house one time. if it were closer to her wedding, i would assume someone dropped out and i was being asked (via text-lmao) as a backup, but she just got engaged 2 days ago.
it is so weird. oh, and she wants the kids in the wedding too, apparently.
no, we weren't "great" friends at all. basically, i was the receptionist at a hair salon and the day i worked it was just her and the owner who were the hairdressers. obviously, we chatted because we were the only ones close in age, but i don't think we ever went out together outside of work stuff. i went to a party at her house one time. if it were closer to her wedding, i would assume someone dropped out and i was being asked (via text-lmao) as a backup, but she just got engaged 2 days ago.
it is so weird. oh, and she wants the kids in the wedding too, apparently.
well, she obviously likes you :)
I don't know the best way to turn it down...but like Tracy said, maybe saying you have other plans or something? idk but good luck...that is not an easy situation to be in!
I would completely use the baby bump/newborn thing too (do you have any idea when her wedding is going to be?).
But seriously-she texted you to ask this??? Sorry-I know we have all moved into the new era in technology, but some things still should be done in person, or at least with a phone call.
If I were you and didn't have the baby thing to count on, I would tell her I was really honored that she would ask me, but that it wasn't in our budget, especially to buy a dress (plus all of the bridesmaid festivities) AND outfits for the kids, but you would be happy to help her out in some other way, like gown shopping with her, help with favors, IDK-whatever.
That is the strangest thing ever. I mean, to ask you AND your kids when you guys really didn't even socialize out of work. So strange. For you, I would use the pregnancy angle - being pregnant, not being able to afford it, whatever but I would totally use that. I don't know if she'd still ask the kids if you weren't in it but hey at least you can just text back. That is SO weird!!!
That is the strangest thing ever. I mean, to ask you AND your kids when you guys really didn't even socialize out of work. So strange. For you, I would use the pregnancy angle - being pregnant, not being able to afford it, whatever but I would totally use that. I don't know if she'd still ask the kids if you weren't in it but hey at least you can just text back. That is SO weird!!!
i think you should use both. money is super tight because you are trying to save for the upcoming baby. i would make it (your text, lmao) short and sweet. i wouldn't use just the pregnancy as an excuse, because she may try to still talk you into it. i would definitely use money as an excuse.
