kdrew wrote:

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3s_a_crowd wrote:

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The first part was in regard to my school.

The part about a more behind the scenes was in regard to the hypothetical school if they wanted to keep her but not have her where middle schoolers would talk.

I know at my church and my school she would be fired. Without a doubt, they have kicked kids out for kissing. And I am FINE with it. There is a code of conduct on morality and regarding physical touch that they sign. So be it. Its a private institution and they can do as they wish.

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Holy lawsuit batman!

 

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 I dont believe so. If she signed a morals contract, as a private institution they are free to fire her.

ok just to clarify on the forgiveness issue, she wouldnt be kicked out of the church or anything and they would support her.

If this school has no such morality clause or nothing in regards to this when she was hired fine. Keep her I see NOTHING wrong with it. Im just saying that if she signed something when was hired about her conduct and this violated it Sorry.

Ok Im headed to mcdonalds. And am pretty much done as I feel Im starting to take this too personal towards my church/school when I know its not about that at all.

Jilly wrote:

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CoffeeQueen wrote:

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I do not think you can legally fire someone for being pregnant, but I am not certain what rule are for private institutions.

Jenn - I am talking middle school aged students. I do not think the younger ones would even put two and two together.

All hypothetical of course :)

Tracy - not Catholic, but Christian based school.

I am curious as to the types of reactions that would come from parents.

-- Edited by CoffeeQueen on Friday 20th of November 2009 12:32:28 PM

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I really hope that since it is a Christian based school that they focus on scripture that tells us that children are a blessing and that we are all sinners needing forgiveness.

I do not think it is the school's business (or parents either) if the employee is married or not.

 

 

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Well, I agree, but I also see on a daily basis that not all Christians are created equal or nor do they interpret things the same way when it comes to scripture. That is a whole other Hot Topic,lol

CoffeeQueen wrote:

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Juni wrote:

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It would not bother me and I would not have any negative reaction in relation to her serving my children food or anything like that. Or anything else for that matter I guess.

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I could not help but laugh at the not having reaction to her serving your children food,lol.

It is not funny, but for some reason that made me laugh.

I just know somewhere that has this situation occuring and the reaction is pretty strong, so I was wondering as parents how everyone would feel.

The angle that I am hearing is a moral/Christian stand point and role model is a word I have heard thrown around.

 

 

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since when does the lunch lady become the role model for the students.  not saying a lunch lady can't be a role model, but they pretty much just serve the kids food.  it's not like she is a teacher or something.

 

CoffeeQueen wrote:

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kdrew wrote:

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CoffeeQueen wrote:

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mctex wrote:

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Wouldn't bother me in the slightest.

If anything, I'd think she'd serve as more of a cautionary tale.

I don't know any middle schoolers who are aspiring cafeteria workers, KWIM?

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It is all coming from the fact that it is sending  the wrong message to children and that the school should not support it.

It always interests me because everyone is a parent and I always wonder how they would feel if it were their child.

I figured most would be fine with it, but wanted to see the reaction to my hypothetical situation of course.

 

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Well she's an adult.

Do you think it would still send the wrong message if she was 30 and unmarried and pregnant?

I'm feeling the ghost of Dan Quail and Murphy Brown here.

I'm not talking about your opinion just throwing that out there.

 

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lol on the ghost of Murphy Brown.

Honestly, I do not think students even know she dropped out of HS or not. I do not even think the adult part is the factor, but I do think it made it a bit more inflammed since they feel the MS girls or boys could relate to her more. Not sure though.

This is not me personally. I think that they would have a problem period of a any age women being pregnant and not married. I think to them it does not go with their value system and they feel their child should not be exposed to it in a school setting. Again, this is all me guessing as to why they are reacting and some of it I have heard first hand.

 

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 hypothetically speaking, right? ;)

Juni wrote:

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CoffeeQueen wrote:

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kdrew wrote:

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CoffeeQueen wrote:

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mctex wrote:

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Wouldn't bother me in the slightest.

If anything, I'd think she'd serve as more of a cautionary tale.

I don't know any middle schoolers who are aspiring cafeteria workers, KWIM?

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It is all coming from the fact that it is sending  the wrong message to children and that the school should not support it.

It always interests me because everyone is a parent and I always wonder how they would feel if it were their child.

I figured most would be fine with it, but wanted to see the reaction to my hypothetical situation of course.

 

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Well she's an adult.

Do you think it would still send the wrong message if she was 30 and unmarried and pregnant?

I'm feeling the ghost of Dan Quail and Murphy Brown here.

I'm not talking about your opinion just throwing that out there.

 

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lol on the ghost of Murphy Brown.

Honestly, I do not think students even know she dropped out of HS or not. I do not even think the adult part is the factor, but I do think it made it a bit more inflammed since they feel the MS girls or boys could relate to her more. Not sure though.

This is not me personally. I think that they would have a problem period of a any age women being pregnant and not married. I think to them it does not go with their value system and they feel their child should not be exposed to it in a school setting. Again, this is all me guessing as to why they are reacting and some of it I have heard first hand.

 

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hypothetically speaking, right? ;)

 

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totally, hypothetically

 

total devils advocate, but I find something interesting.

If a teacher who was young and unmarried was pregnant would it make the difference. There seems to be a lot of mention of the fact she is JUST a cafeteria worker. I mean in a sense to me that is saying that if she had a higher position that it would hold more influence?

I guess to me it makes no difference what she is/does. To me I guess I was looking more at the fact of do you have a problem morally with someone in a school setting that is working with kids.

I do find it interesting how her position is looked at as not one that kids would look up to. I  mean would it be ok for the janitor, but not the teacher? People that work in a school have direct contact with children regardless of their capacity.

See, really I guess it is all the same. People determine or discriminate without realizing it. I mean essentially that is what those parents are doing also, no? Am I going way off?

It is interesting to get opinions from different people. I will say each side feels the exact opposite from the other.

CoffeeQueen wrote:

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total devils advocate, but I find something interesting.

If a teacher who was young and unmarried was pregnant would it make the difference. There seems to be a lot of mention of the fact she is JUST a cafeteria worker. I mean in a sense to me that is saying that if she had a higher position that it would hold more influence?

I guess to me it makes no difference what she is/does. To me I guess I was looking more at the fact of do you have a problem morally with someone in a school setting that is working with kids.

I do find it interesting how her position is looked at as not one that kids would look up to. I  mean would it be ok for the janitor, but not the teacher? People that work in a school have direct contact with children regardless of their capacity.

See, really I guess it is all the same. People determine or discriminate without realizing it. I mean essentially that is what those parents are doing also, no? Am I going way off?

It is interesting to get opinions from different people. I will say each side feels the exact opposite from the other.

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If it was a teacher I would still have no problem with it.

It all goes back to the parents, I think and how open they are with their middle school children with teaching them about sex.

I hope that what I teach my children about being responsible and safe will stick with them and if they see an 18 year old unwed pregnant lady they won't think, hey I'm gonna go have sex, if she can do it, let's all do it.

Kind of silly to think our kids would be that dumb.

I think the pregnant lunch lady would probably be the last thing my daughter would think about if her boyfriend is pressuring her into sex.

She would hopefully being thinking about the lessons we've taught her.

As far as just her being present in the school and and tarnishing the perfect image of a family with a married mom and dad...I can't even wrap my head around that way of thinking.

CoffeeQueen wrote:

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total devils advocate, but I find something interesting.

If a teacher who was young and unmarried was pregnant would it make the difference. There seems to be a lot of mention of the fact she is JUST a cafeteria worker. I mean in a sense to me that is saying that if she had a higher position that it would hold more influence?

I guess to me it makes no difference what she is/does. To me I guess I was looking more at the fact of do you have a problem morally with someone in a school setting that is working with kids.

I do find it interesting how her position is looked at as not one that kids would look up to. I  mean would it be ok for the janitor, but not the teacher? People that work in a school have direct contact with children regardless of their capacity.

See, really I guess it is all the same. People determine or discriminate without realizing it. I mean essentially that is what those parents are doing also, no? Am I going way off?

It is interesting to get opinions from different people. I will say each side feels the exact opposite from the other.

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For me the only reason I pointed out about the role model thing was in reference to parent's saying that makes her a bad role model. Which I guess is flawed in the sense that I do think it is good for children to look at teachers and see them as role models (so long as they are positive influences - just being a teacher doesn't automatically qualify in my book) but I still wouldn't have a problem with a pregnant, unmarried teacher.

I guess the fact is if people are worried because she is unmarried - there is only one way their children would know that - if they told them. And even then I just really don't think it's an issue. If there is a morality clause that is totally different - the question is how would you feel, right? So, yeah, teacher, cafeteria worker, janitor - I would not have an issue with my child being around that. And I am very much in the camp of thinking that sex should be saved until marriage but I find that to be a very personal choice and not something I extend onto others.

I just feel like we are in this phase where so many parents are trying to control every single aspect of their children's lives and what they are exposed to and in the meantime they are missing out on what is really going on and their children are not learning what they actually want them to learn. It's bizarre to me.