books on relationships?

apies · Guru

books on relationships?

Robin · Guru

I wish I had some suggestions for you. I liked the Love Languages book okay. Glen just said his was touch because he wanted to do it.

I'll think about it some more.

apies · Guru

robin, matt's #1 is touch too. for the same reason.

neither one of us could figure out for sure what his #2 and 3 would be. i think probably words of affirmation. and then maybe quality time, but idk.

i just know that when i read a book that gives me new ways of interacting and listening to matt, we tend to gel better, if that makes sense. i am looking for something along those lines.

Robin · Guru

apies wrote:

robin, matt's #1 is touch too. for the same reason.

neither one of us could figure out for sure what his #2 and 3 would be. i think probably words of affirmation. and then maybe quality time, but idk.

i just know that when i read a book that gives me new ways of interacting and listening to matt, we tend to gel better, if that makes sense. i am looking for something along those lines.

Questionnaire-type stuff like that is always skewed for Glen because of his travel phobia. Any question about vacations or romantic getaways, etc. don't really reveal his love language, just that he doesn't want to go anywhere.

You already have the Love Dare, right? Has Matt read it? Does he read these books? Or just you?

apies · Guru

Robin wrote:

apies wrote:

robin, matt's #1 is touch too. for the same reason.

neither one of us could figure out for sure what his #2 and 3 would be. i think probably words of affirmation. and then maybe quality time, but idk.

i just know that when i read a book that gives me new ways of interacting and listening to matt, we tend to gel better, if that makes sense. i am looking for something along those lines.

Questionnaire-type stuff like that is always skewed for Glen because of his travel phobia. Any question about vacations or romantic getaways, etc. don't really reveal his love language, just that he doesn't want to go anywhere.

You already have the Love Dare, right? Has Matt read it? Does he read these books? Or just you?

i read love dare. i also watched fireproof. i really tried to get past the jesus stuff, but i couldn't so it just wasn't a good answer for me.

matt read the 5 love languages. he watched most of fireproof with me (he's walked in after i started watching it).

3s_a_crowd · Guru

hmm most of the books Id reccomend would probably be religious based.

I hope some people have some good input for you.

Robin · Guru

How do you feel about Dr. Phil? He's got a book called Relationship Rescue that has good reviews on Amazon.

sappy · Guru

i've read 8 million self help books ( and have a shit memory)

let me think (slash look over them on amazon and try to remember what was good) .....

ok - i know oprah has had on harville hendricks before (getting the love you want) and i liked what he said a lot but i haven't read any of his books.

i read men are from mars, women are from venus a while back but i didn't get too much out of it.

this looks interesting to me ...

-- Edited by sappy on Wednesday 13th of October 2010 04:59:46 PM

Erin · Guru

April, lol at the jesus stuff. We deal with that too.

Robin, lol at the travel stuff. I cant wait to meet you some day, you are hysterical.

Anyhoo, I went to two seminars by Dr. Scott Haltzman this summer.They were really good. I bought two of his books - Secrets of Happily married women and Secrets of Happy Families. I have only purused them, but I really liked the info in the seminars. Funny, I havent read a full book since I had kids. I need to dind them on audiobook...

Anyway, I think I posted some snippets before on communication. I really like that his stuff is based on science. IDK how to explain, but he roots many discussions in physiological and biological differences in men/women, etc, that I (and my athiest husband) find more compelling than faith based works. For example, women read eye contact as paying attention, so we seek having a man look directly at us while we are talking. While biologically, for men, direct eye contact is a sign of aggression, so it is not how they show "paying attention", rather it makes them uncomfortable and uneasy. While of course this is not universal, understanding those differences helps facilitate communication.

http://secretsofmarriedmen.com/

Hope that helps!

Cuppycake · Guru

Love & Respect.

It's my favorite book of allllllll time.

The title pretty much says it all - but basically it talks about how a woman's main need is love, and for men it's respect... how they are related, how to show your affection, etc. (The tidbit from Amazon says: "A Simple Message

A wife has one driving need -- to feel loved. When that need is met, she is happy. A husband has one driving need -- to feel respected. When that need is met, he is happy.

When either of these needs isn't met, things get crazy. "Love and Respect" reveals why spouses react negatively to each other, and how they can deal with such conflict quickly, easily and biblically. "

It has a lot of references to the Bible, but the main points, as well as the stories that are used to drive home those points aren't biblically related. I won't go as far as to say it's ignorable, but there's a lot of stories that don't touch on the Bible, and there's a lot of scientific study, so although the Bible is very present, I don't think it would be to the point where you wouldn't really get something from the main point, kwim?

It seriously changed my life, and I find myself reading pieces of it whenever I start to slip.

3s_a_crowd · Guru

Cuppycake wrote:

Love & Respect.

It's my favorite book of allllllll time.

The title pretty much says it all - but basically it talks about how a woman's main need is love, and for men it's respect... how they are related, how to show your affection, etc. (The tidbit from Amazon says: "A Simple Message

A wife has one driving need -- to feel loved. When that need is met, she is happy. A husband has one driving need -- to feel respected. When that need is met, he is happy.

When either of these needs isn't met, things get crazy. "Love and Respect" reveals why spouses react negatively to each other, and how they can deal with such conflict quickly, easily and biblically. "

It has a lot of references to the Bible, but the main points, as well as the stories that are used to drive home those points aren't biblically related. I won't go as far as to say it's ignorable, but there's a lot of stories that don't touch on the Bible, and there's a lot of scientific study, so although the Bible is very present, I don't think it would be to the point where you wouldn't really get something from the main point, kwim?

It seriously changed my life, and I find myself reading pieces of it whenever I start to slip.

this was going to be one of my suggestions.