Mark has a pattern of being a giver. At first I thought it was adorable when he wanted to give ALL the change in his bank for the offering in Sunday school. That's when he was 3. Whenever his friends come to play, they usually leave with stuff Mark has given them--a matchbox car, a silly band, some little thing that is okay with me. On Sunday, Mark said he gave his friend Cole his brand-new transforming Hulk truck that he got on Saturday for his birthday. I made Cole give it back, and I told Mark and Cole that Mark was not allowed to give away his toys. (Mark told me that Cole said he would trade him for a rocket but then decided he wanted to keep his rocket.)
Yesterday I noticed that all 4 of the five dollar bills Mark had gotten for his birthday were not in his bank. I asked where they were, and Henry told me that Mark had given them to him and Chad "for winning at Mario". He gave each of them $11! Chad had managed to leave to go home right before I noticed the missing money, but I lectured Henry and made him give the money back. Glen was FURIOUS and tried to chase after Chad but Chad was long gone. Then Glen just fussed and yelled at both the kids.
Today I plan on having a long talk with Henry while Mark is at swimming lessons about how he's old enough to know better than to take money from Mark AND how he needs to make sure that other people don't take stuff from Mark. That's part of his job as a big brother.
I hate that Mark keeps giving away his stuff especially now that he's going to school because I know the other kids will take advantage of that. I'm certain that Cole (who is also 5) has already figured out that Mark will give him whatever he asks for. But I don't want to totally quench his desire to give. It's not a horrible trait. Glen hollered at him and told him he couldn't give ANYTHING to ANYONE ever again, including church.
Robin, I am sorry you are having to deal with this. I guess the upside is, Mark must not really be materialistic. The only idea I have that might work is playing some sort of what if giving game.
Mark, what if we were playing cars and I asked if I could have your red car. What would you do?
Then go over some scenarios like saying it's okay to play with the car here. It needs to stay here because that's where the car lives.
I don't know about Mark, but sometimes I find it's best if I go over some likely scenarios before Elizabeth is going to do something so that she has it planted in her head what it is she should do. I realize you can't do that all the time, but maybe review it before he plays with friends or goes to school or other situations.
Kiera and a couple of her friends were doing this the other day. I really think its just the age, and they are trying to show their friends they care for them. In their minds, you buy something or give something to someone to show them they are your friend. Except at this age, the kids dont know to say "no really, you shouldn't have. " lol. We just explained that she cant give anything away without talking to the mommies. They are welcome to come over and play with it anytime, but it stays here or stays with her.
not sure how that works with money, but, Kiera doesnt get money. we are only just starting to talk about an allowance and how that will work.
