Hypothetical situation

CoffeeQueen · Guru

Hypothetical situation

3s_a_crowd · Guru

It depends on the school. Catholic school/private school yes. Public no.

Im glad to see she has a job.

However if the school deliberately teaches against this sort of thing Id hope they wouldnt present it to the children in such a way

-- Edited by 3s_a_crowd on Friday 20th of November 2009 12:19:44 PM

Juanita · Guru

Do the children KNOW she's 18 and unmarried?

I just know if it were SG, she'd have no clue how old someone was or if they were married if no-one told her.

kdrew · Guru

No wouldn't bother me at all.

If my children had questions I would answer them as best as I could.

What kind of action are you talking about?

Firing her.

CoffeeQueen · Guru

I do not think you can legally fire someone for being pregnant, but I am not certain what rule are for private institutions.

Jenn - I am talking middle school aged students. I do not think the younger ones would even put two and two together.

All hypothetical of course :)

Tracy - not Catholic, but Christian based school.

I am curious as to the types of reactions that would come from parents.

-- Edited by CoffeeQueen on Friday 20th of November 2009 12:32:28 PM

Juni · Guru

It would not bother me and I would not have any negative reaction in relation to her serving my children food or anything like that. Or anything else for that matter I guess.

Juanita · Guru

CoffeeQueen wrote:

I do not think you can legally fire someone for being pregnant, but I am not certain what rule are for private institutions.

Jenn - I am talking middle school aged students. I do not think the younger ones would even put two and two together.

All hypothetical of course :)

Tracy - not Catholic, but Christian based school.

I am curious as to the types of reactions that would come from parents.

-- Edited by CoffeeQueen on Friday 20th of November 2009 12:32:28 PM

I think, since it's a Christian based school, it would be more of an issue than in a public school.

Middle school aged children might know she's unmarried, and they'd have lots of questions I'm sure, so if it were me and I was a parent at that school, I'd just have to explain to them that while it's wrong in the eyes of the Lord to have sex before marriage, people do it and God still loves them and will forgive them.

I hope to be honest with my children, just as I was to Courtney when we had the "talk". That I myself had pre-marital sex, but once I met Kenneth, I regretted that decision, because it would've been so much more special to have saved myself for him I think. And that's the whole point of "saving yourself" so it will be special for the one God intended you to be with.

As far as what the school should do is a tough call too. I think it does set a bad example, but so do a gazillion other things in this world, lol. That's where the parenting comes into play. It should all start at home. I wouldn't have a problem with her staying there and serving my kids though.

-- Edited by Juanita on Friday 20th of November 2009 12:38:47 PM

CoffeeQueen · Guru

Juni wrote:

It would not bother me and I would not have any negative reaction in relation to her serving my children food or anything like that. Or anything else for that matter I guess.

I could not help but laugh at the not having reaction to her serving your children food,lol.

It is not funny, but for some reason that made me laugh.

I just know somewhere that has this situation occuring and the reaction is pretty strong, so I was wondering as parents how everyone would feel.

The angle that I am hearing is a moral/Christian stand point and role model is a word I have heard thrown around.

Sonya · Guru

I wouldn't care at all.

mctex · Guru

Wouldn't bother me in the slightest.

If anything, I'd think she'd serve as more of a cautionary tale.

I don't know any middle schoolers who are aspiring cafeteria workers, KWIM?

3s_a_crowd · Guru

Like here at our church school i know for sure she wouldnt stay there. But they have removed children for lesser things. There is a strict code of conduct that is signed when they go to the school and if something like this would get them into trouble at the school where this is hypothetically I think I wouldnt leave her in that position. Perhaps a more behind the scenes type job if they wanted to keep her.

CoffeeQueen · Guru

mctex wrote:

Wouldn't bother me in the slightest.

If anything, I'd think she'd serve as more of a cautionary tale.

I don't know any middle schoolers who are aspiring cafeteria workers, KWIM?

It is all coming from the fact that it is sending the wrong message to children and that the school should not support it.

It always interests me because everyone is a parent and I always wonder how they would feel if it were their child.

I figured most would be fine with it, but wanted to see the reaction to my hypothetical situation of course.

Juni · Guru

CoffeeQueen wrote:

Juni wrote:

It would not bother me and I would not have any negative reaction in relation to her serving my children food or anything like that. Or anything else for that matter I guess.

I could not help but laugh at the not having reaction to her serving your children food,lol.

It is not funny, but for some reason that made me laugh.

I just know somewhere that has this situation occuring and the reaction is pretty strong, so I was wondering as parents how everyone would feel.

The angle that I am hearing is a moral/Christian stand point and role model is a word I have heard thrown around.

I know, I worded that funny, huh? I just don't see the big issue. I mean, I see how it could be an issue but then it gets into the whole judging thing and give me a break - the people yelling the loudest can't claim they don't sin so it's just hard.

The problem with these types of situations is that it is a sin you can't hide, kwim? But really, why not taking the loving and compassionate road and use it as a learning moment. I know plenty of great christians that have sex and aren't married or have children out of wedlock. Unless she specifically signed an agreement (which is totally possible at a private school) to maintain certain standards then I don't see a problem.

I'm sorry I don't consider the lunch ladies to be role models in my children's lives anyways so I don't think they should be set up on a pedestal and people should be mad at them not being a good role model. I don't mean it in a mean way - I just think our society has it totally backwards on who we are encouraging and letting our children see as role models. I think any profession is respectable in that people work hard and earn a living but come on - not a good role model? She's an 18 year old girl who is most likely struggling about being a new mom at a young age potentially on her own. How about some compassion?

-- Edited by Juni on Friday 20th of November 2009 12:51:58 PM

CoffeeQueen · Guru

Juni wrote:

CoffeeQueen wrote:

Juni wrote:

It would not bother me and I would not have any negative reaction in relation to her serving my children food or anything like that. Or anything else for that matter I guess.

I could not help but laugh at the not having reaction to her serving your children food,lol.

It is not funny, but for some reason that made me laugh.

I just know somewhere that has this situation occuring and the reaction is pretty strong, so I was wondering as parents how everyone would feel.

The angle that I am hearing is a moral/Christian stand point and role model is a word I have heard thrown around.

I know, I worded that funny, huh? I just don't see the big issue. I mean, I see how it could be an issue but then it gets into the whole judging thing and give me a break - the people yelling the loudest can't claim they don't sin so it's just hard.

The problem with these types of situations is that it is a sin you can't hide, kwim? But really, why not taking the loving and compassionate road and use it as a learning moment. I know plenty of great christians that have sex and aren't married or have children out of wedlock. Unless she specifically signed an agreement (which is totally possible at a private school) to maintain certain standards then I don't see a problem.

I'm sorry I don't consider the lunch ladies to be role models in my children's lives anyways so I don't think they should be set up on a pedestal and people should be mad at them not being a good role model. I don't mean it in a mean way - I just think our society has it totally backwards on who we are encouraging and letting our children see as role models. I think any profession is respectable in that people work hard and earn a living but come on - not a good role model? She's an 18 year old girl who is most likely struggling about being a new mom at a young age potentially on her own. How about some compassion?

-- Edited by Juni on Friday 20th of November 2009 12:51:58 PM

I personally think reactions to this are out of fear or something. The fact that maybe they fear this will happen to their child and if their child does not see it, then that would make it ok and never happen to them?

Just my guess.

CoffeeQueen · Guru

3s_a_crowd wrote:

Like here at our church school i know for sure she wouldnt stay there. But they have removed children for lesser things. There is a strict code of conduct that is signed when they go to the school and if something like this would get them into trouble at the school where this is hypothetically I think I wouldnt leave her in that position. Perhaps a more behind the scenes type job if they wanted to keep her.

Why woudl a more behind the scenes job be allowed if the church school has a strict code. Do you really think they sign something that says if you become pregnant out of wedlock you are fired?

3s_a_crowd · Guru

The first part was in regard to my school.

The part about a more behind the scenes was in regard to the hypothetical school if they wanted to keep her but not have her where middle schoolers would talk.

I know at my church and my school she would be fired. Without a doubt, they have kicked kids out for kissing. And I am FINE with it. There is a code of conduct on morality and regarding physical touch that they sign. So be it. Its a private institution and they can do as they wish.

Jilly · Veteran Member

I would have zero problem with this at all, public or private school.

That would be a total shame if she were fired over this. Good for her for working to support herself/unborn child.

CoffeeQueen · Guru

3s_a_crowd wrote:

The first part was in regard to my school.

The part about a more behind the scenes was in regard to the hypothetical school if they wanted to keep her but not have her where middle schoolers would talk.

I know at my church and my school she would be fired. Without a doubt, they have kicked kids out for kissing. And I am FINE with it. There is a code of conduct on morality and regarding physical touch that they sign. So be it. Its a private institution and they can do as they wish.

Just curious if you care to share. What religion is this school?

Ok, I got ya on the behind the scenes comment then. I thought you meant for your school.

kdrew · Guru

CoffeeQueen wrote:

mctex wrote:

Wouldn't bother me in the slightest.

If anything, I'd think she'd serve as more of a cautionary tale.

I don't know any middle schoolers who are aspiring cafeteria workers, KWIM?

It is all coming from the fact that it is sending the wrong message to children and that the school should not support it.

It always interests me because everyone is a parent and I always wonder how they would feel if it were their child.

I figured most would be fine with it, but wanted to see the reaction to my hypothetical situation of course.

Well she's an adult.

Do you think it would still send the wrong message if she was 30 and unmarried and pregnant?

I'm feeling the ghost of Dan Quail and Murphy Brown here.

I'm not talking about your opinion just throwing that out there.

kdrew · Guru

3s_a_crowd wrote:

The first part was in regard to my school.

The part about a more behind the scenes was in regard to the hypothetical school if they wanted to keep her but not have her where middle schoolers would talk.

I know at my church and my school she would be fired. Without a doubt, they have kicked kids out for kissing. And I am FINE with it. There is a code of conduct on morality and regarding physical touch that they sign. So be it. Its a private institution and they can do as they wish.

Holy lawsuit batman!