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Post Info TOPIC: I don't know what to say.
Amy


Senior Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 260
Date: Nov 11, 2009
I don't know what to say.
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I MISS YOU!!!

and hello (says the person hiding under the chair).

I don’t even know where to begin.  I have been in a terrible funk for the past year. I signed up for the new MS board and then I fell apart.   I am in a bad, dark scary place and I am trying to come out the other side.  

Losing my dad has been so hard, much harder than I expected. Couple that with my back and all the issues therein- I blinked and a year flew by and yet it also drug on so painfully slowly that I thought I would never see it end.

I’ve been working on keeping up with people on FB because that just seemed easier, less intimate.  I felt like it would be wrong of me to lurk on MS and not post and I knew that I had NOTHING of myself I could offer to anyone that would be of any substance and you all deserve so much more than that. Yet the truth remains.  I miss you.

I am still in the midst of the abyss and I don’t know how much my friendship might be worth but I want you all back in my life. FB alone is just not enough. You are my friends. I care about you and I miss you very much.



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Alison


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 721
Date: Nov 11, 2009
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Amy, this breaks my heart.  I have so much affection for you and I feel awful that I didn't realize you were going through this.

I love you to pieces and I am always here for you if you need a shoulder.  And I hope that above all, you have the happiness that you deserve.


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3s_a_crowd


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 3966
Date: Nov 11, 2009
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I miss you being here so much. I often wonder how your doing.

If you need anything let me knowe


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Lizzy


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 1714
Date: Nov 11, 2009
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oh Amy,  I am so sorry to hear what you are going through, but so glad to see your post.  I know how hard it is to lose a parent and the only thing I can say is that it is alright to miss them and grieve....there is no time limit.  we are all her for you too ((hugs))

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Picture-Perfect


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 988
Date: Nov 11, 2009
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Amy this makes me so sad to know you've been going through this alone. You don't have to offer us anything, just yourself and happy, sad, whatever emotion you are is enough. Life can be so freaking hard, I completely understand. You shouldn't go it alone. I'm praying for peace for you right now, don't stay away let us help you through.

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crystal


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 1303
Date: Nov 12, 2009
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amy, it isn't always about what you give to us.  we are here for you too.  if you needed us, you should have come to talk.  i missed you!  i'm so sorry that you've been having a hard time.  i hope things are starting to get better for you.  please drop by, even if it is just to vent.  we are here for you *hugs*

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apies


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 7897
Date: Nov 12, 2009
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amy, i am so sad that you are in such a bad place right now.

i am always here for you. ms is a family - people stray and have other priorities, but you are always welcome here.

:hugs:

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CoffeeQueen


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 5514
Date: Nov 12, 2009
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Amy - I feel so awful. I always knew you were on FB and never even thought about the fact you have not posted on MS. I am so sorry that you are suffering alone. Always know you can come here. It is your home away from home.

Hugs and Kisses

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CoffeeQueen


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 5514
Date: Nov 12, 2009
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PS - That is the most adorable Strawberry Shortcake that I have ever seen.

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sappy


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 5126
Date: Nov 12, 2009
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Alison wrote:

Amy, this breaks my heart.  I have so much affection for you and I feel awful that I didn't realize you were going through this.


I love you to pieces and I am always here for you if you need a shoulder.  And I hope that above all, you have the happiness that you deserve.

amy this is exactly what i wanted to say.

i had no idea you were having such an awful time right now. i am so sorry you're struggling.

please know you are loved.

 



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Dddiii


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 1534
Date: Nov 12, 2009
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I wish I had known so I could be sending you hugs all this time! 

Please know that you can always come here for support!  I've missed you and b/c we've kept in touch here and there on FB, I just figured you were busy.

Have you thought about talking to your doctor or going to see a counselor to help you through this rough patch?

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Sonya


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 10400
Date: Nov 12, 2009
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Amy, we love you and are here for you.

I'm so sorry you are in this dark place. I certainly understand how that can feel. It's been a long time since my dad died (20 yrs this fall which seems unbelieveable) but I can still get into a dark place about it.

I'm sending lots of hugs.

There is absolutely no need to apologize and please know you are always welcome here. We love you and we missed you.





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daisy


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 1771
Date: Nov 12, 2009
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i'm sorry youre having a hard time amy.
please dont worry about having lost track of MS for a bit - no big deal - you've been SUCH a supportive member and friend here for so long.
we're always here for you.
i hope you have some face-to-face support to help you get through this patch.  are you confiding in friends and family?  counseling?  you need to take care of yourself.  xoxo.


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happylib


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 2797
Date: Nov 12, 2009
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Amy, thank you so much for posting this and letting us know how you are doing.  I am sure it wasn't easy, but as you can tell from the other posts, we love you in whatever state your feeling may be.  Grief is hard and comes in so many shapes and forms.  I am sorry I did not realize that you were in such a dark place.  Please continue to post and don't worry about what you do or don't say.  Plain and simple, you are wanted here.  I am sending some prayers your way too. :hug:

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a_mastermom


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 998
Date: Nov 12, 2009
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You don't have to say anything! We are here for you for you. :hugs

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Alicia
Jilly


Veteran Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 57
Date: Nov 12, 2009
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Thinking of you and will be praying for you Amy. So sorry it has been so hard. Many hugs!!

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muffy


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 1694
Date: Nov 12, 2009
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I love you too!  please try to take care of yourself and if there is ever anything we can do for you you know where to type...

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Boots and Bananas


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 7029
Date: Nov 12, 2009
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Oh Amy my heart is breaking. I am a million miles away but please let me know if you need anything

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~~~Allison
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Juni


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 3530
Date: Nov 12, 2009
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Ditto what Alison said. I check in on FB all the time but I had NO idea - none - that you were having such a hard time. I can't imagine how difficult the last year has been. I am so sorry things have been so bad all at once. I heart.gif you and it kills me to know that things are so hard. Please stick around - don't stress about how much you post! We love you, we miss you, you are ALWAYS welcome here.

Let me know if there is anything that you need. Have you been to a counselor? (People are probably sick of hearing me say that, sorry.) I hope that you are able to find some ways to mend your heart and your back in the next year. I am so sorry for your difficulties.

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Juanita


Guru

Status: Offline
Posts: 7138
Date: Nov 12, 2009
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Amy, I love you and miss you.  Praying right NOW for God to get you out of that funk!!

If you need ANYTHING, I'm here for you!!

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